Thursday, June 25, 2009

Game On!

The Game Show Network recently re-ran my 1981 appearance on "The $20,000 Pyramid." Having polished off Betty White and her partner, I moved with my partner Jane into the Winner's Circle.

Dick Clark: Okay, you know the drill. Correctly guessing all six categories in 60 seconds wins you $20,000. Jane, you've chosen to receive, Ron's dick will give

(Betty White calls out from her seat).

Betty: She's in good company!

Dick Clark: 60 seconds on the clock. Ready? Go!

Me: Apes…
Jane: Animals, Things In A Zoo
Me: Apes….My Balls
Jane: Big…
Me: Gilda Radner
Jane: Hairy Things!
Dick Clark: Right! Next!

Me: Butter, Crisco
Jane: Things You Cook With
Baby Oil, Vaseline
Jane: Lubes!
Dick Clark:
Good! Next!

Me: A wristwatch….Dudley Moore’s Cock
Jane: Things You Find In Susan Anton’s Ass!
Dick Clark: Halfway there! Next.

Me: Guys want me…
Jane: What Kate Jackson would say, what sports cars would say
Me: I feel good, I make them cum
Jane: What Charo…
Me: Paul Lynde gives me all the time.
Jane: What a blowjob would say!
Dick Clark: Running out of time!

Me: Oh boy, uh, Ang Ez
Jane: Vietnam?
Me: Ah--Eh--Aleh-I-Pah
Jane: Things In the Koran?

The buzzer sounds. The audience lets out a collective “Awww.” Dick Clark walks over.

Dick Clark: Let Me Try… Gah Baz Amaca
Jane: How God Bless America sounds if you sing while giving head?

The audience applauds.

Dick Clark: I guess it helps to have experience. That’s all the time we have, folks! Goodbye.
blog comments powered by Disqus